FASHION WORLD

hi, you know, fashion is all about being creative, look foward and the past. segalanya bagi aku perkara yang menyeronokkan. tapi seriously, bekerja dalam industry ni memang kita tak akan dapat lari dari macam2 situaton, betul? of course betul! contohnye, model lambat, make up/rambut tak kene macam yang photographer nak,  lighting utk camera tak menjadi, kesuntukan masa, rushing, kalau fashion show boleh la nak rushing2, kalau photoshoot nk rushing dah kenapa? gambar buruk photographer jugak kene nanti, kalau nk rushing pon make sure everything is done professionally to produce high end results. aku bukan apa, bukan nk berlagak bagus or apaaaa ini just based on research yg aq buat selama jadi FP ni.. hehe

macam aq ni, newbie lagi, cita-cita besar, hahaha tiap2 hari buat research nk ambil gambar macam patrick demarchelier and keje under anna wintour. tapi jauh lagi la nk berjaya AHAHAHA. tu kisah lain, tapi rules untuk berjaya dalam bidang fashion ni mudah je bagi model2 kat luar sana.... 

1. tepati masa... masa sangat lah penting. and aku sndiri dah terbawa bawa pasal masa, punctual tu sangat penting bagi aq, kalau kene menunggu lagi lah, 5 10 minit takpe kalau sejam dua jam... sila self motivate... seriously, kalau tak punctual, anda akan terus dipecat. member aq kerja tropicana life, hari ketiga dia kerja lambat 30 minit, terus kene pecat, no warning. sadiss

2. as a model .. sebagai model, kne sematkan dalam jiwa tu yang model ialah PRODUCT . tak kira lah macam mana make up artist nk buat dgn muka mu, rambut, warna apa baju dia nk letak kat anda, terima, jgn nak memandai tuka itu tuka ini, and jgn nak keluarkan prkataan "eh buruknya muka aq" "eeeeee tak suka lah mcm ni, rambut apa ni,? kenapa lipstick i warna hitam bukan pink, i suka pink" "eh i tak suka lah kasut ni i nak pakai kasut tu lah sbab i suka" you know what FUCK OFF. ^_^   majority semua org dlm industry ni tak suka kerja dgn model mcm tu, and then, PLEASE jangan budget LEGENDARY sangat wey, kalau tak faham high fashion punya poses tu apa, sila humble... even gisele bundhen pon cakap mcm yang aq ckp ni sbb aq copy ayat tu dari dia. sebb tu dia berjaya.

3. confident/ fucking fierce.... ini sangat lah penting. yakin je tau! jangan nk menggelabah, hang fikir poses and face expression hang ja, tak payah duk serabut pasal hair and make up, lighting apa suma tu, tu biar kami uruskan.... 

wel tu jela yg aq nk cakap, sorry terkasar bahasa

AIDILFITRI ISSUE

COMMERCIAL BEFORE MY ENTRY: SORRY FOR MY "HO YEAH HO YEAH ENGLISH"

yow guys.. happy aidilfitri to all muslim on earth, and and im here wants to invite all of you, no matter what is your religion is, culture, or even country, to join us for aidilfitri.. lots of food!! yeay! gonna gain my weight back! :D 

so this year ramadhan are totally one of a kind.. learned a lot, crying a lot, ha yes, i remember my late dad... i  did fashion shoot with my friends.. wanna see it?? here! haaha http://azhamohamad.blogspot.com/ and guys, i just sold my soul to fashion photography for lots of reason! well this is my prsonal blog, not gonna talk to much about fashion ey! haha

mmm my "baju melayu" colour this year.... haaaa earth colour! light brown, a little gold effect with the fabric, and some texture~ looks good and i like it! thanks brotha! 

issue for this month? 

FRIENDS! but, not with my close friend, don't wanna talk about it, they just another my failure list... like i told, im a fashion photographer and well, unfortunately im straight. and they thought that im not, just because of my passion and my "sissy" atitude, well that's just me! . sorry don't take my words in a different way, u r gay? you cool, u r transgender? u r cool. u r homo and u afraid to act like one and tell the truth? u r confuse. typical malay, a guy do fashion photography? "GAY" plus, i don't have a girlfriend. y? girlfriend = money = commitment = love = crazy.. hard to find one that understand me very well to become "the one" .stupidity controls mind. see ? did i just talk about it? haha so i just let them be. har har har har. 

so, that's all. tq for visiting my fucking "rare" blog. ahahhahaha personally from the silver olympic medal winner, AZHAR har har har har~

MAKE YOU FEEL MY LOVE

u know, lately im living in a life that is full of madness. people can't see what i saw. i just don't know, life just doesn't makes sense to me right now. i need a time, space since last 2 weeks cause this is a complete disaster. im not just talking about friends here, also about my future. ape yg aq tulis sekarang ni pon mcm sedar x sedar je. kalau tongkang tebalik ayat tu maaf la yeh. ade 6 hari cuti ni nk ape pon tatau, assignment mcm mudah nk disiapkan. x srabut mane pon. eh ter kerek pulak, tapi tu yg betulnye, assignment bukan punce aq hilang pedoman. sebabnye adalah, kenapa aq still singgle and super available sangat2 ni ha? nk tahu sebab ape? im losing my orientation track doh! yes can u believe it? no im not. bila da ckp mcm ni, silap2 aq jadi bisexual pulk nnti, tp ntahla weh. x bole bg ape2 statement kenchang sebab aq pon tatau nk wat ape. jiwa kosong kot. ok sekarang ni, aq tengah menggila nk buat photoshoot. tengah gile tahap ayam. kalo korang nk tgok gamba2 yg aq da shoot, edit sume tu g la tgok kat second block aq tu yeh, AZHA MOHAMAD PHOTOGRAPHY 

http://azhamohamad.blogspot.com/  ni la blog aq yg x seberapa, x macam melissa rodwell punye blog pon or even annas easkey punye, ye ah sebab baru nak naik, tp idea melambak! 

boleh x aq citer somehing general kat sini? oh, blog aq kot, suke hati ah nk cite ape kan? ekekeke aq agak terkilan la jugak bile aq x dapat ambil gmba ngn arwah ayah aq waktu sebelum dia meninggal dulu, sebab aq x de picture same2 dengan die. haaaaayy sebulan dua ni, aq selalu terbayang2 muke die je x kire kat mana2. damn betul, kadang2 aq mcm nk melalak kat public bile ternampak iras2 muke die. nk2 kalau body size sama. terkedu kejap. tapi nk buat cane kan? bile die tinggalkan aq waktu kecik2 dulu, mak aq ckp maknanya aq dah ready utk hadap hidup ni, tp aq rasa mcm x ready, 10 tahun lamanya, sekarang aq terkilan even pantang fikir pasal die bertakung air mata. susah senang family aq dulu waktu die dah meninggal dulu sape tahu kan? aq ngn mak aq pegi niaga kat pasa malam tiap2 hari, aq balik sekola terus g pasa malam naik bus, mak aq gerak dulu sbub aq ade kelas extra, kene hempas hujan balik 10 11 malam, keje sekolah siap tgh malam 6:30 bagun siap2 tggu bas.. tiap2 hari macam tu, waktu tu x ramai pon nk kwan ngn mak aq kecuali org yg niaga sama2 kat pasa malam tu.  yela kiteorg x kaye mane pon kan.. watu tu abang akak aq sume study lg. tp sekarang tibe ramai mengaku sedara mara. mane x nye, ibu tunggal berjaya besarkan anak2 dengan baik. tetiba dapat jemputan makn ngn datuk itu ini datin itu ini... sebab nak kenenkan abang saya dengan anak dorang. kadang2 kalau aq naik van sekali ngn mak aq nk g pasa malam dulu, mak aq selalu nangis tibe2 sebab rindu kat ayah aq. bile aq tnye kenapa nangis? die cakap ayah selalu susuh kite senyap waktu dia driving dulu. sekarang mak ter ikot ikot perangai die. mak teringat tu je. aq? ape yg aq ingat? muke die je, kenangan bersama2 x ingat, suara die? aq x ingat. tapi aq happy gile bile setiap kali aq datang kubur die, dahan pokok bunga yang aq patahkan then cucuk kat kubur die hidup segar bugar. setiap kali aq datang pokok tu hidup rendang, kecuali ade satu x hidop sebab lembu pijak. this is hard you know, tahu x betapa jelesnye aq bila dengar member aq dapat call dari ayah die, citer pasal kisah funny ngn ayah die ape sume. tapi sebab ayah aq la aq kat sini, semue bnde yg aq buat nk bg die happy. walaupun aq hanya taip je kisah ayah aq kat sini dah basah la jugak collar baju aq lap air mata jantan nih. tak tahu la cane nk ckp lg rindunye kat die. ade 2 malam lepas aq termimpi die. terjaga aq terus melalak. tapi cover2 sikit ngn bantal sebab nanti roomate aq nmpak. hahaha tapi x pe lah tuhan nak die pergi dulu kite iye kan je sebab mak saya baru balik umrah ckp ayah aq jumpe mak aq kat sana and die happy tgok anak2 die sekarang. and die mention nama aq kat mak aq! menitik air mata aq bile mak aq bg tau kat aq. dah la aq x penah nangis depan mak aq. and nenek2 and atuk2 kat kg sume cakp muke ayah aq waktu kecik2 mcm aq. haiiish sebak aq bile teringat kat die. 

antara lagu yang buat aq terpikir pasal die lagu adele "make you feel my love", christina perri "thousand years"

maybe lirik die certain2 x kene kan tp most of it perfect

tapi lagu adele tu memang buat aq melalak bagai nk gile. lirik die tepat dgn ape aq rasa. tp pape pon, tq lah sebab sudi baca entry yg ni. sorry sebab emotional n poyo sikit haha 

When the rain
Is blowing in your face
And the whole world
Is on your case
I could offer you
A warm embrace
To make you feel my love

When the evening shadows
And the stars appear
And there is no - one there
To dry your tears
I could hold you
For a million years
To make you feel my love

I know you
Haven't made
Your mind up yet
But I would never
Do you wrong
I've known it
From the moment
That we met
No doubt in my mind
Where you belong
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/a/adele/make_you_feel_my_love.html ]
I'd go hungry
I'd go black and blue
I'd go crawling
Down the avenue
Know there's nothing
That I wouldn't do
To make you feel my love

The storms are raging
On the rolling sea
And on the highway of regret
The winds of change
Are blowing wild and free
You ain't seen nothing
Like me yet

I could make you happy
Make your dreams come true
Nothing that I wouldn't do
Go to the ends
Of the Earth for you
To make you feel my love, To make you feel my love

THE LEOPARD GIRL

SHE IS THE LEOPARD GIRL

too contrast :/

official editorial photo

sorry for the quality of this photo, face book just suck!

the beginning

hi... its 2012 actually finally, the year with full of speculations. new year eve was amazing like usual, and just so you know, ict was cuhrayzee. but we have so much fun. together with amy, sharidah, eipy, ciko, eny, dayang, ayul, adib, arip, amin, raja... unfortunately, linda,apis, RK, couldn't make it with us... traffic was suck! well today im not gonna talk about what is my new dream for 2012. its just not me. 

my goal is, i wanna be fashion photgrapher, and also interior designer. im tired hiding my "GAY" dream job to the world. i feels so free capturing moments through my lens and designing some space for people. cause what i think i what i will get doing this job. btw i got to go now, im not feeling so good cause my mood is everywhere. i am sad with my self. 

what is going on?

hi guys. back here so late *______* have u ever wondering y d hell in the world friends always come and go? i don't understand that but aaaaaamm..... it is hard right to lose them? i am not so sure. now i am listening to pretty reckless-make me wanna die. i heard this song first time when i watched victoria's secret fashion show lately. very intersting opening. with candice opening d show looking like that, pow! uh-may-zinnnnn!  so let's get back to my story. where m i just now? mmmmm ok. i have a few friends that seems like they trying to run away from me. ok not just me, with me n my friends. y, i don't understand. so i don't wanna think a lot about that. im just wanna know how it feels like when losing our friend. ooo i thought it is already 4 a.m but it is 2:30.. hihihi i need time machine. 

ok the second thing is. officially, it is the right time for me to have a girlfriend. y?cause litarally i found my self confused. oooo it is not my orientation. im just confused my my self with what the heck m i doin. how could it b like this. yeah after 5 and a half year being single, totally drive me cuh ray zeee... so many speculation about me has been made. i can find a girl to be my girl in a short time. butta, the q is, it is just for fun or is it for me to love her like for real. i don't wanna treat her like a bull dog if i can't love her just because to cover up all the rumors that i am gay. that is not fair for those girl. so i made my mind clearly, "no matter what people gonna say about me, go on. but when the time is right, game on". sya told me that i might be a good lover if i had a girl. poww! how d hell in the world this guy with so much energy goin on, loud, hyper, extremely half rude, hard-headed, lazy but hardworking, swinging mood person can be a good lover. for god sake, i don't get it neither.

so, i am not so sure if i have a class tomorrow morning cause, everybody keep sayin that "esok? kelas? ade ke weh?" hahahaha powww again! 80% happy answer. well i am listening to nicki minaj right now. super bass. what is that mean? super bass? boobs + ass? oh kemon nicki, we knew what's that song real meaning is. butta... your song and your voice r so cool. haha my hair looks terrible without my hat. very unbalanced. 

to make sure that im in a good condition, i will stay in da house tomorrow think about who i am really was. if i don't have a class tomorrow hahaha. so its time for me to walk around to c what is d new posts of my friend. :) have a good night and day people *______- red malboro just  make my head spinningaround. haha

WHY?

THERE IS SOME THING IN MY BODY THAT STILL SLEEPING. 

AND IT IS NOT THAT EASY BEING POSITIVE 

EVERY SINGLE MINUTES OF MY LIFE.

I AM A HUMAN, NOT A DANCER.

I AM A PERSON WHO NEVER BE AFRAID OF MAKING A MISTAKES. 

IF I HAVE A CHANCE TO SAY THAT I AM MAD WITH EVERY SINGLE ONE OF

YOU, I WOULD. I AM SICK AND TIRED OF BEING BLAMED BECAUSE OF OTHERS.

I HAVE LEARNED WORK ETHIC, COMMITMENT, PUNCTUAL, LOVE AND LIE,

AND LIFE. WITH A WICKED MIND, I'LL STAY

LIKE THIS. NOT AS A GAY, STRAIGHT, BISEX, BUT AS A PERSON WHO THINK ABOUT

HIS FUTURE LIFE.

 LITERALLY, I WANNA BE,

A PHOTOGRAPHER THAT CAN EARNED LOTTA MONEY,

AN ARCHITEC,

SO AM I SUPPOSED TO CARE ABOUT MY GRAMAR RIGHT NOW? NO. I AM MAD.

Y?

CAUSE I AM LOSING WHO I AM AND WHO I AM SUPPOSED TO BE.

I AM SECRETLY SAD AND DO CRY Y :

STILL SINGLE.

STILL HAVING THE SAME RESULT.

STILL ALONE. EVEN THOUGH I AM HAVING A LOT OF FRIEND IN MY LIFE.

IT IS GONNA BE DREAM COMES TRUE IF ..

I M SMILIN'

assalammualaikum. ola!!! happy month even though struggling a bit with co-workers and manager. hahahaha but its over. over~~sepanjang bekerja kat situ... i learned work ethic, commitment, punctuality, and money!   hahaha x mau dah aq keje banquet. keje kat cafe department lagi bayekkk. sekarang kulit hitam sebab baru balik pangkor... x pe berbaloi. bestnye lain macam dari dulu. walaupun da 2 kali datang pangkor, tp ni paling best ah. hahaha minggu depan dah start semester 6. the last chapter for diploma. cheewah.pui. hahahaha x tau ape jadi, tapi bia tuhan tentukan. heeee. 

+

i just fell in love lately. again..heeee so... hit me with any love song, i can sing it like the song is mine. hahahaha bunga tahi ayam sudah kembang mekar... diam diam! :)

api kebanggan kami selama 2 malam. hahahaha

SETELAH SEKIAN LAMA

HYE!  lamae x melawat di blog sendiri ini. hahahaha sebulan lebih! "mane ade!!! 2 bulan lebih ah!"(suara hati cakap.) keje cuti sem mmg terase cepat gile doe. sebulan lebih cuti rase mcam 3 minggu je cuti tapi x po jang. gaji best beli barang idaman. hahahaha aq nk beli kasut. aq nk beli bag vans.. gile bag tu lawa gile. rase mcam budak UK kalau pakai kasut tu. eh bag tu. actually kasut n bag skali hahaha. gaji simpan lebih dari sparuh so bole shopping. ekekeke minggu depan g pangkor ngn aiman ayul ahrip sume.. woooaaa excited. mule2 macam malas nk pegi sbub da sue kali pegi. tapi kalini gi ngn member, bebas pulak aktiviti. ahahaha mesti ah lagi best. sape cakap x mmg lupe member ah. pukap x jadi pegi. die meratap di klang mengenangkan result. ai dayumm result betul2 cukup makan macam haremmmmmmmm.... 3.00 xpo jang. last semester aq buat rombakan study. kurang lepak, lebihkan pool, study lebih. ok? seyes ni... tiada tipu helah. pool bukan melepak, pool itu adalah sukan. so aq bersukan. ekekekekeke 

pada hari yang mulia 4-11-2011.... tarikh keramat seorang budak kampung masuk ke bandar selama 2 tahun setengah, menyambut hari jadinya yang jadi pada tarikh ni... dan di hari yang sama, menjenguk result sem 5.... puii aq la orangnye!! result kali pertama tgok, x de perasaan langsung. 3.00? nk happy ke sedih.? sebab betul2 cukup2 makan. HJ(haram jaddah). malam sikit... g makan ngn ayul adib mokk sume then kene tepung tawar.... hambek! 

yang x disangka2.. ade org ingat bday aq.. terharu la. terharu tahap usop wilchair ahahaha 

perkembangan keluarga? oh. sedikit confused. asal aq x dibawak ke sabah sekali bulan 12 ni hah? mentang2 da naik sem.. haiihhh untung ah... yang abang g london, yang mak n kakak kakak g sabah.... yang adiknye duk study kat shah alam. haiiihhhh sabah kot. lawa la tempat2 kat situ. merajuk rajuk ah aq.  mak kate lain kali la kite pegi eh? "mmmmmm"- jawapan aq...(harap2 dapat pegi dengan sebab kesian... tapi x dengar cite pon dapat pegi.,puii) 

cuti sem da nak abes. keje lagi tige minggu lebih..boleh collect dalam beratus2 -harapan- tapi sifat malasmenjadi jadi!!!!

akhir citer. nant
i aq post lagi ye sebab jam 5 pagi adalahh waktu sah utk makhluk mcm aq beradu dikamar sewa ini. hahaha selamat malam.

MAKES ME WONDER~!

hai again. its been a while that im not posting any kind of shitty shitty blah here :) am i busy? not that much, im just busy thinking what am i gonna be for next year. i need a new track, to be who am i supposed to be when i grow up. some people just living their life like there is no tomorrow. i have my tomorrow. a fucking diamond waiting for me so i do what i want, what i wanna have. im 20, and this is the time.. of my life... wahhhh im so black eyed peas hihihi.. there is no joy for me when i spent my family money too much. they work their butt out till 5pm for me and themself makes me think that im the last person in d family, and i should be sucessed just like them. "you have nothing to worried about, you've got your faimily, they can give you what you want" that's the word gonna make or break you. for me, i can became lazy, bossy, arrogant or in other word, loser. the bigest loser. yes they are my air that i need to survive.. where i really2 need a favor from them so here we go. it was many years ago, my late that said to my mom, "you have nothing to worried about azhar, he's gonna doin fine" and now im worried about myself, if its true, i have to think about a right thing. eyes to eyes with my brother helped me a lot about my future, what kind of course fit me well and my ability and chances for me to have a really nice job. the answer is, interior design.... yes! i like it like it!! again.. im so rihanna right now HAHAHA imma gonna survive and i will.

new life just perfect for me i guest!!!! hihi just meet new people and my ex school classmate moved to this fucking big city. now its easy for me to talkwith them, no facebook anymore! just right here! anytime! if i have a problem, they are the first to know and a few people, ahhh sorry not you, i mean you. you r no longer my inspiration. have a nice life without us :)  no turning back when i said this cause imean it. so my last advice for you, CHANGE! notice my new sign above? WHEN I THINK THEM IMMA SPEAK

listening to matt costa, cold december and astair over and over again...... cold august guys!! :) this is my new insomnia picture!

not photoshop but brainyshop

mmmm i found this pictures on tumblr... ver creative... we don't need photoshop but brainyshop

 

 

 

and this one is my favourite one... and idk y.. very calm....

YET I AM STILL~

hai yaal.. sup? i mean what's up hahahahaha my mid term holiday is kinda relax... its almost over but yet, i am not satisfied with this free time.. always have a lot of drama going on. then how i reacted with it? im just laughed so much as i can by watching a lotta lotta movie, mtv drama and pool. yes pool. + i gotta this fever that is just ruined my days a bit but i am fine. yes do not forget, my national geographic n solar system documentaries.. nerd right??? hahaha a little nerdy mood nerver hurt anybody~ :) 

do you guys remember when i said that i am losing my self??? yet i am still.. so confusing. this is not about my orientation. of course i am straight. just still stay single! aq rasa x ada org tnye pon aq straight ke x kat sini hahahahaha the most wondering thing right now is am i found the right people in my life?

PAPADOM 2~

~ NO EXPLAINATION AVAILABLE ~

 

 

 

 acting is so tired

THE WAKE UP CALL

i guest this blog is not dead, its just coma for a few weeks. hahahaha well i think im just got the wake up call. call for what? call for me to go to the next level! haaaa that's what i wanted. im just so chill even when im broke, i am chiller when im rich. HAHAHAHA haaa that's one of the examples my next level. want another? i don't know but im feeling better when i looked in the mirror. hahahahaha this is not about how i looks like, his is about me. oh ok, mid term break is coming, tomorrow is the last day of the fucking classes then im free, i can go anywhere that i wanted, have some rest. no assignments (this is just my dream.. as long as imma student, assignment is my soul, so i will do my assignments like usual). 

people, i noticed that facebook getting worst than ever right? cause the IM, just annoyed me so badly, its look so weird.. that's the only problem left. ahahaha and, last two days, my friend asked me about who's my crush is? well i bet you know who.. hihihi so i don't wanna say anything, i see her everyday so i better keep my mouth shut (like seriously, nobody knew about this). when we talk about someone special, what does it means to you? i mean other than family. it can be your friends, lover, or ex-special someone. i don't find the answer of this, i do appreciated it but in a different kind of ways.... "stone does sink in the water, ball just kept floating and heading no where...." woooaahhhhh that's my own quotes!!!!! imma legend! livvviiiing legend HAHAHA 

ANNOUNCEMENT

AND THIS BLOG IS DEAD

short note~!

hai peeps!! it is been a while that I'm not posting anything right here. hahaha like wise.. ups and down life just drive me crazy. so.. i played pool, movies, hang out with my fucking friends and also finished my assignments.. now, im feeling a bit relax but my test on Wednesday... hahaha crazy right. this is the time of my life. BEP said that. but i ain't complaining, this is what i chosen. ok bye im so sleepy again so see you guys later :D btw rihanna music so good! 

I AM FINE NOW.. TQ :)

LOST IN MY SELF~!

I CAN SAY THAT RIGHT I AM LOST IN MY SELF. I DON'T HAVE A PLAN FOR MY SELF OTHER THAN STUDY STUFF. I DON'T EVEN HAVE A SECURE MIND THINKING, ALWAYS NEGATIVITY INSIDE OF MY HEAD. ALL THE WORDS THAT CAME OUT FROM MY MOUTH WAS FROM MY MIND. SO I MEAN IT AND ITS HURT OTHER PEOPLE FEELING. I HAVE BEEN MOTIVATED MYSELF TO NOT TO BELIEVED ANYBODY SO HARD AND AT THE END, I HAVE TO PAY THE FINE. HOW I CAN REDEEM BACK ALL OF MY MISTAKE? TOTALLY DOESN'T EVEN KNOW HOW I CAN DO IT. 

YOU CAN SEE IM SMILING, BEING CRAZY, LOUD, FUN, HYPERACTIVE ALL DAY LONG IN FRONT OF YOU GUYS.. BUT, WHEN I GOT BACK HOME... EVERYTHING IS JUST SO WRONG. YAH, ITS MIGHT BE JUST BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE A GIRLFRIEND. I DON'T KNOW. EVERYTHING IS JUST NOT THE SAME! NOT THE SAME LIKE I USED TO. 

I WANTED MY SELF BACK. LOST IN THE MIDDLE OF MY LIFE IS JUST WRONG. GOTTA TELL YA, I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL I AM TALKING ABOUT. ITS LIKE EMPTY WORDS FROM ME BUT ITS HURTS.. PEOPLE SAID THAT YOUR LIFE NEVER GONNA BE  PERFECT IF YOU DON'T HAVE A PROBLEMS. BUT THIS IS TOO PERFECT FOR ME. WHAT M I SUPPOSED TO DO? OTHER THAN PRAY TO GOD. I AM RECENTLY.. ITS WORKING.. OTHER THAN THAT. THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I FEELS SO LOST WITH MYSELF. THE FULL EVENT ANTICIPATION JUST MAKES ME FEEL WANNA BURST~~ ITS SUPPOSED TO BE FUN... AND ITS MY MOMENT I THINK THAT WAKE UP CALL FROM ANYBODY NEVER GONNA CHANGED ME. IT IS FROM MY SELF. 

FRIEND COMES AND GO, MONEY COMES AND GO, CAR COMES AND GO, A LOT OF THING COME AND GO. BUT HOW CAN I CHOOSE TO NOT TO LET IT GO. I AM NOT REGRET WHEN I HATES SOMEBODY. I REGRET THE THINGS THAT I WANNA TO STAY TILL THE LAST BEAT OF MY HEART  GONE. 

YOU CAN SAY THAT TROUBLE IS OUR FRIEND. YES IT IS. IT IS ACTUALLY THE BEST DEMON THAT YOU HAVE INSIDE OF YOUR HEAD. YOU WANT YOUR FUTURE, YOU CAN HAVE IT...JUST ERASE ME FROM YOUR PAST.. I NEED YOU TO GONE FAST. THATS WHAT PEOPLE SAID THAT WHEN THEY HATE YOU.

LADY GAGA~!

never knew~!

aiiii sekarang semuanya dah x sama... 

aq sangat sedih kalau nk tahu.

KPB pon busy, x leh kua,malas kelua, x sempat aq nk share problem dengan die.

duduk rumah bosan, lagi bosan kot dari semester break.

kalau lah bende2 ni sebenarnye x betul, aq happy gile. 

kawan semua ramai. tapi kawan yang lebih penting dan x ramai tu x ada bile lepak bersama buat aq sangat sedih dan bosan. bff la katakan. 

next story,

ada orang pecahkan rahsia pasal hujung sem lepas dekat aq sebab rasa bersalah dekat aq, membuatkan aq rasa sangat lah seperti orang yang mudah dipermainkan, ditipu, dan dilayan seperti sampah. should be nothing to me about that. 

senang kata, kalau kau still nak berkawan dengan aq, yeayyy la yang aq ckp..

tp kalau kau malas nk berkawan dengan aq lagi, ckap pon dgn aq mcm nak x nak,

x pa ah, lupakan sahaja pasal kita punye persahabatan,

aq x nak jadi orang yang dilupakan bila kau senang,

pertolongan dekat depan mata aq bila kau susah.

dah letih dah... harap dapat lepak dengan kau lagi macam dulu. aq nak sangat ni.

disebabkan 1 human being perubahan menjadi ketara.

ape tah salah aq sampai kau buat mcm ni.